LCMS Convention Workbook St. Louis, Missouri — 1998, Page 353

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THEOLOGICAL DOCUMENTS

Your group may wish to discuss strengths and weaknesses of
O’Donovan’s thesis about the dangers that come with separating the pro-
creative and relational aspects of sexual intimacy in marriage.

Second, in its 1981 report on Human Sexuality the Commission states:

In view of the Biblical command and the blessing to “be fruitful and
multiply,” it is to be expected that marriage will not ordinarily be volun-
tarily childless. But, in the absence of Scriptural prohibition, there need be
no objection to contraception within a marital union which is, a3 a whole,
fruitful... there may be special circumstances which would persuade a
Christian husband and wife that it would be more responsible and helpful
to all concerned, under God, not to have children. Whatever the particular
circumstances, Christians dare not take lightly decisions in this area of
their life together. They should examine their motives thoroughly and
honestly and take care lest their decisions be informed by a desire merely
to satisfy selfish interests.

Your group may wish to discuss what kind of “special circumstances”
might persuade Christians not to have children and what the dangers are
that a decision for childlessness may mask faithless and selfish interests.

CLOSURE

We believe that the key insights relevant to the question of voluntary
childlessness are again the insights relating to the one-flesh union of hus-
band and wife. In our discussions of surrogacy and artificial insemination
by donor we argued that God intends the conceiving of a child to take
place within the context of the one-flesh union of husband and wife. This
claim was supported by reference to the Commission’s reasoning in its
1981 report on Human Sexuality. We now argue that the biblical material
concerning the one-flesh union of husband and wife also indicates that in
the ordinary course of married life, God intends the union of husband and
wife to be fruitful in the procreation of children.

Before we examine the relevant biblical passages more closely, we
once again refer to Romans 8 and the recognition that each of us is touched
by the futility to which the whole creation has been subjected. We are not
at this point examining what Christian husbands and wives might be
advised to do about procreation when confronted by specific evils that
threaten us, and under which we along with all of creation groan. We
ought not jump immediately to hard cases before trying to discern God's
guidance for Christians in ordinary circumstances. We note, too, that the
topic of procreative choices initially concerns marriages among Christians
who are of child-bearing age. It is in these marriages that the question of
roluntary childlessness arises.

* Human Sexuality: A Theological Perspectine. 19-20.

25

The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it
is not expedient to marry.” But he said to them, “Not all men can receive
this saying, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who
have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made
eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves
eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to receive
this, let him receive it.”

Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them
and pray. The disciples rebuked the people; but Jesus said, “Let the chil-
dren come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom
of heaven.” And he laid his hands on them and went away. (Matthew
19:3-15)

And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for
a man to divorce his wife?” He answered them, “What did Moses com-
mand you?” They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of
divorce, and to put her away.” But Jesus said to them, “For your hardness
of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of cre-
ation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave
his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become
one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has
joined together, let not man put asunder.”

And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And
he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and mamies another, commits
adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries anoth-
er, she commits adultery.”

And they were bringing children to him, that he might touch them; and
the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it he was indignant, and
said to them, “Let the children come to me, do not hinder them; for to such
belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive
the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his
arms and blessed them, laying his hands upon them. (Mark 10:2-16)

Notice that both Matthew and Mark report a common sequence:

1. The discussion began with a question that was meant to make marriage
more like other humanly chosen and defined relationships. Jesus was
asked by the Pharisees whether legitimate reasons could be given for
divorce. People of every age have continued to ask questions regarding
the permanency of marriage. Why the lifelong commitment? Why not
make provision for change and adjustment over the course of many
years? Business partnerships do not necessarily require lifelong com-
mitment; friendships do not necessarily require lifelong exclusivity
Why invest our choices in marriage with such special (and challenging)
significance? -

2. Jesus responded by explicitly recalling the unique institution of mar-
riage in Eden, and he affirmed from Genesis 2 that “what therefore God
has joined together, let not man put asunder” (Matt. 19:6; Mark 10:9).

Our thesis is that both God’s Word and practical considerations that
arise counsel against voluntarily choosing not to conceive a child in mar-
tiage. We will not be arguing for this thesis on the grounds that contra-
ception and family planning are in themselves wrong. We also acknow!-
edge that special considerations might !ead a Christian husband and wife
responsibly to conclude that they would better serve God, the world, and
each other by not having children. We are nevertheless persuaded that
what God says in his Word about the unique nature of the marital rela-
tionship urges couples ordinarily to choose for rather than against children
in marriage.

The biblical theme concerning the one-flesh union of husband and
wife is enunciated in the creation narrative in which God gives Adam and
Eve to each other in marriage. “Therefore a man leaves his father and his
mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). The
“one-flesh” image has suggested to more than one interpreter not only the
uniquely intimate relationship of husband and wife but also the child who
so fully and uniquely incarnates the one-flesh unity of husband and wife.*
In Human Sexuality the Commission combined these two realities this way:
“Asa result of God's creative power at work through their union the child
incarnates—makes physical and represents in the flesh—the mystery of
this union.”?7

When Jesus was questioned concerning marviage, he made explicit ref-
erence to Gen, 2:24 and a remarkable sequence ensued. Jesus’ words and
actions are reported both in Matthew 19 and in Mark 10. Here are the two
passages:

And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to
divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that

he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, and

said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined

to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two

but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put

asunder.” They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a

certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He said to them, “For your

hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the
beginning it was not so. And | say to you: whoever divorces his wife,
except for unchastity, and marries another, commits adultery.”

* Gerhard von Rad, Genesis. rev. ed (Philadelphia: Westminster Press, 1961), 85; Leon
Kass, “Man and Woman: An Old Story,” First Things (November, 1991) 24-26; Paul Ram-
sey. Fabricated Man: The Ethics of Genette Control (New Haven; Yale University Press, 1970),
32-44; Edward Schneider, Artifical Insemination (New York: Division for Mission in North
Amenca-—Lutheran Church in Amenca, 1986), 12; cf. als Heimut Thielicke, The Ethws of Sex
(New York: Harper and Row, 1964), 259-62

Human Sexuality A Theological Perspective. 19

26

Jesus plainly refused to see marriage as analogous to other types of
humanly chosen relationships, friendships or contracts. In marriage God
joins husband and wife uniquely. God's intention, Jesus said, is that no one
separate the couple. In this regard the relationship of husband and wife is
made to be like the relationships into which God places us initially in life—
ineradicable relationships to mother and father, sister and brother. Conse-
quently, the church has always treated marriage as a lifelong joining of
wife and husband.

3. Jesus’ disciples saw clearly what Jesus was saying and were deeply

troubled. Both Matthew and Mark report that they pressed Jesus on this
point. Matthew reported their words: “If such is the case of a man with
his wife, it is not expedient to marry” (Matt. 19:10).
Jesus did not back away from the unique nature of the marniage rela-
tionship. “Not all men can receive this saying, but only those to whom
it is given” (Matt. 19:11). “Whoever divorces his wife and mares
another, commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband
and marries another, she commits adultery” (Mark 10:11-12)

We observe that when the disciples invited Jesus to see marnage in a
more “realistic” light—as simply a special case of any number of humanly
chosen relationships and friendships—he adamantly refused. Marmiage is
unique: God joins the couple; their union is meant to be lifelong; sexual
intimacy is confined to the union; and God joins them so that “thev are no
longer two but one flesh” (Matt. 19:6; Mark 10:8).

Christians are committed to trusting God’s guidance concerning mar-
tiage. While some Christian communities, following tendencies present
also in Jesus’ day, have diminished the importance of lifelong commitment
in marriage, by far the majority of Christians throughout the church’s his-
tory have understood the Scriptures to teach the view of married life sum-
marized above.

But what does this understanding of marmiage have to do with volun-
tary childlessness within a Christian marriage? We continue with God’s
Word in Matthew 19 and Mark 10:

5. Children were brought to Jesus.

6. The disciptes, still trying to be “adult” about things, sternly warned that
Jesus was busy teaching about marriage and ought not to be bothered
with childish things.

“But when Jesus saw it he was indignant, and said to them, ‘Let the chit
dren come to me, do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom
of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of
God like a child shall not enter it.’ And he took them in his arms and
blessed them, laying his hands on them” (Mark 10:14-16; ef. Matt.
19:14-15).

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